61.2 (Inner Truth) –> 14 (Possession in Great Measure)
Changing Line: Inner strength or weakness are always being communicated to others. If you are devoted to higher things, that will be felt. If you are not, that too will be felt. Self-development is the only way to attain the power of inner truth. When our values are firmly in place and we nourish ourselves with correct thoughts, a good influence cannot be prevented.
Yesterday’s general dismal atmosphere, punctuated by intermittent storms, followed by this morning’s bright chilly gorgeousness, feels like an extended metaphor for the transition between yesterday and today. While the SHOCK I worried so intensely about yesterday did not come, no fewer than THREE of my dearest friends got some incredible shocks. I lay in bed, eating cupcakes and watching 30Rock and intermittently reading a book of poems and fielding their emails and phone calls. No sobbing-and-barfing for me, thanks, no straying off the beaten path. We went real bland and happy yesterday. Finally the time came for the evening’s social events (SHOW UP AND BE NICE) I was anxious, but put on my dress, my earrings, my eyeshadow, my cute little gray flats. I had a few drinks with J and then we went to a phenomenal reading which was followed by a showing of Jurassic Park. And then I walked home in the drizzle, my purple scarf pulled wide and wrapped around me, my hair fluffing and curling in the humidity. I made tea, slid between the covers, and blessed everyone and everything I could think of that I was not, having been given the SHOCK of my life, sobbing-and-barfing on the bathroom floor.
The outcome of today’s reading–Possession in Great Measure–affirms that an extended effort to be humble and wide-eyed and accord the Self with the rhythms of life without protesting or asking too many questions has brought me in accord with The Sage and now we can work together toward creative goals. My written exchange with Rabbit last night was of a similar tenor: Humility. Invisibility. Stillness. I did not think I could sink into these so comfortably–I thought I would struggle against them wildly–but they cradle me. Strange and steady.
It’s a bit of a gold star or good report card. I feel pleased.
